"That Zen Buddhism Stuff"

By Jim Freeman

6 September 2022

"When I got that rebound, my thoughts were very positive, the crowd gets quiet, and the moment starts to become the moment for me. That's what we've been trying to do...that's part of that Zen Buddhism stuff. Once you get in the moment, you know when you are there. Things start to move slowly, you start to see the court very well. You start reading what the defense is trying to do. I saw that moment. When I saw that moment and the opportunity to take advantage of it...I never doubted myself. I never doubted the whole game." - Michael Jordan

(Fernando Medina-NBAE/Getty Images)

The above quote by Michael Jordan is taken from George Mumford's excellent book The Mindful Athlete and was recounted to the author after Mr. Jordan hit the shot pictured above to win the 1998 NBA championship. Mr. Mumford collaborated with Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn to start the Inner-city Stress Reduction Clinic in the early nineties. That connection ultimately led to Mr. Mumford being introduced to coach Phil Jackson and his role working with the Chicago Bulls during their last three championship seasons in 1996, 1997 and 1998.  In 1999, Mr. Jackson moved on to coach the Los Angeles Lakers and Mr. Mumford was asked to consult with those teams as well. The Lakers would win five NBA titles under Jackson's guidance including three in a row from 2000 to 2002. Kobe Bryant commented on Jackson's influence in this area in his book The Mamba Mentality, "When Phil Jackson came...I started to understand the importance of my personalized meditative process. From then on, I placed an increased emphasis on it." 

"There will be calm and tranquility when you are free from outside influences and are not disturbed. Being calm means having no illusions or disillusionment with reality." - Bruce Lee, The Tao of Jeet Kune Do

The term meditation comes from the Latin word meditatum which means "to ponder". There are many different ways to meditate including such methods as transcendental, compassion and mindfulness. We will focus our attention on mindfulness meditation in this essay. 

There are writings in India that discuss the training of the mind that date all the way back to 1500 BC and later works from approximately 600 BC in the writings of the Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu (author of Tao Te Ching). Meditative methods for developing and calming the mind have been used for thousands of years across a wide variety of cultures. Meditation is a primary tool in the art of mindfulness training. The term "mindfulness" is defined by Jon Kabat-Zinn in The Mindful Athlete as "paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, nonjudgementally, as if your life depended on it."  Mindfulness is a state of awareness, a state that is focused on the present moment. It allows us to be fully present where we are right now without being distracted or overrun. It is a capability we all possess at some level but training will lead to an enhanced ability to control our thoughts and emotions and stay in the present. Controlling does not mean we try to suppress unhelpful thoughts and feelings when they arise. Instead of being surprised or becoming more anxious at their arrival, we expect those thoughts and emotions to come and gently nudge them aside so our minds can be in a more productive state. All this has proven helpful to me during such mundane times like standing in line in a grocery store or sitting in traffic. In my pre-meditation days, which were not that long ago, I would sometimes react in a volatile manner to everyday circumstances like those mentioned above. For example, I have memories of me shouting and pounding the passenger seat in my car (it was empty) while stuck in traffic...a response that I've thankfully outgrown. Those incidents are embarrassing and humbling but I use them when discussing ways to gain control of thoughts and emotions.

"If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present." - Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

Buddhist teachings describe the unsettled, restless, easily distracted and indecisive mind as a "monkey mind", a mind that is hopping about in a reactive and uncontolled manner. Mindfulness practices help us calm the monkey mind by training us to become more aware of our thoughts, remove judgement from them and return us to the present moment. Dr. Herbert Benson describes this calming effect as the "Relaxation Response" in his impactful book by the same name published in 1973. In that book, Benson discusses how some of our increased ability to calm and control our minds is a result of physical changes in the brain that take place during minfdulness training. He writes, "Zen monks who meditated...developed a predominance of alpha waves, brain waves usually associated with feelings of well-being. Furthermore, the alpha waves increase in amplitude and regularity during meditation." In the past, we thought at some point in the maturation process our brains were fully formed and there was no changing them. Much current thinking regarding how the brain works and adapts differs from that view and revolves around the term "neuroplasticity". Neuroplasticity refers to physical changes in the brain that occur in response to our environment whether they are an increase or decrease in the size of certain parts of the brain or altered neural pathways connecting to each other and other areas of the brain. 

A 2015 Washington Post interview with Sara Lazar, a neuroscientist at Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School, discusses the effects of meditation on the brain. An eight-week mindfulness study found changes in volume in five different regions of the brain. The participants in the meditating group for that study saw thickening in the following four regions:

The posterior cingulate ("involved in mind wandering and self relevance"), the left hippocampus ("assists in learning, cognition, memory and emotional regulation"), the temperoparietal junction ("TPJ associated with perspective, empathy and compassion") and the Pons ("where a lot of regulatory neurotransmitters are produced"). 

The amygdala ("fight or flight part of the brain important for anxiety, fear and stress in general") got smaller in the group that went through the mindfulness-based stress reduction program. The mindfulness training was practiced by the test subjects an average of 27 minutes a day but many adherents meditate for only 10-15 minutes a day and see benefits. Kobe Bryant (pictured above in Taiwan in 2016) discussed his daily mindfulness routine in an interview with Oprah Winfrey, "I meditate every day and I usually do it for ten or fifteen minutes in the morning, as that prepares me to face whatever comes next." Consistently engaging in a meditation program physically alters the brain as well as trains the mind to become more aware of thoughts and emotions which leads to an increased ability to control them. Dr. Benson writes, "Our Western society is oriented only in the direction of eliciting the fight-or-flight response. Unlike the fight-or-flight response, which is repeatedly brought forth as a response to our difficult everyday situations and is elicited without conscious effort, the Relaxation Response can be evoked only if time is set aside and a conscious effort is made." 

"Remain quiet. Discover the harmony in your own being. Embrace it. If you can do this, you will gain everything, and the world will become healthy again. If you can't, you will be lost in the shadows forever." - Lao Tzu, Hua Hu Ching

Dr. Amishi P. Jha is a neuroscientist and a professor at the University of Miami and she posits in her TED Talk that our minds wander to the extent that in roughly half of our waking moments our attention strays from the task at hand (monkey mind). In her outstanding book, Peak Mind: Find Your Focus, Own Your Attention, Invest 12 Minutes a Day, Dr. Jha discusses presence and purpose as well as the solution to our mind-wandering, "Mindfulness exercises are intended to strengthen and improve coordination between brain networks that carry out a variety of attentional functions: our ability to direct and maintain focus, notice and monitor ongoing conscious experience, and manage goals and behavior." Dr. Jha outlines a four-week program that involves the use of three different kinds of meditation practices each with a different focus and form of attention. Each day's schedule is for a 12-minute period but initially she suggests practicing for just three minutes. The amount of time spent will increase as you become more and more comfortable with the practice. The first method concerns directed attention (on your breathing or some other specific bodily awareness). The second category is an open monitoring exercise where you see yourself "standing on the river bank watching the water flow by". You see thoughts and emotions as they come flowing by without trying to capture or analyze them. The third method is a connection or "loving-kindness" meditation where you focus on improving your "ability to connect and offer goodwill" to those around you as well as to yourself. In all three methods your mind will eventually wander off. As you become aware of that wandering you gently guide your thoughts back to your meditation. Jha writes, "Success here does not mean that your mind never wandered, or that you didn't move at all, or that you experienced bliss, peace or relaxation. Rather, success means you put in the time and did the practice. Success is completion." (See Dr. Jha's book for a complete outline of her plan.)

Increased awareness of our thoughts gives us a chance to be more intentional in choosing them and thus, allows us to choose thoughts that are more constructive whether they be related to performance or our relationships with others. Dr. Rollo May states in his book, The Courage to Create, "Human freedom involves our capacity to pause between stimulus and response and, in that pause, to choose the one response toward which we wish to throw our weight. The capacity to create ourselves, based upon this freedom, is inseparable from consciousness or self-awareness." The more adept we become at using that pause, however brief, to select a more constructive response, the more we will be able to make decisions aligned with what we truly aspire to and who we truly wish to be. This is opposed to spending the bulk of our time being controlled by our reactions and remaining a puppet of our circumstances and the people around us.

"The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it." - Thich Nhat Hahn

Mindfulness practices are used by high performers across a variety of disciplines but heightened performance isn't the only positive result of such exercises. Recent studies show potential health benefits from mindfulness practices including decreased levels of depression, reduced anxiety and stress, improved memory, slowed cognitive decline, and lowered blood pressure. Sara Lazar states, "Mindfulness is just like exercise. It's a form of mental exercise, really. And just as exercise increases health, helps us handle stress better and promotes longevity, meditation purports to confer some of those same benefits." Dr. Benson cites decades-old studies that show decreases in oxygen consumption, resting heart rate, respiration, and blood pressure during meditation. These are "indicative of decreased activity of the sympathetic nervous system and represent a hypometabolic, or restful, state. On the other hand, the physiologic changes of the fight-or-flight  response are associated with increased sympathetic nervous system activity and represent a hypermetabolic state...This is why we feel the Relaxation Response is of such import, for with its regular use it will offset the harmful effects of the inappropriate elicitation of the fight-or-flight response."

As mentioned earlier, meditation and mindfulness have been common practices across Eastern and Western cultures for many centuries. They may be somewhat different in certain specifics but they all possess a number of the same qualities, characteristics and benefits. Dr. Benson quotes William James from The Variety of Religious Experiences, "The fact is that the mystical feeling of enlargement, union and emancipation has no specific intellectual content of its own. It is capable of forming matrimonial alliances with material furnished by the most diverse philosophies and theology, provided only they can find a place in their framework for its peculiar emotional mood." Benson then goes on to cite examples in ancient and not so ancient histories of Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, Taoism, and Sufism among others. Down through the ages, many in these disparate cultures have consistently practiced and advocated a meditative lifestyle. Some engage in a mindfulness practice for the physical health benefits and some do so in order to gain control of their thoughts and emotions. Some look to improve their free throw percentage or to more effectively handle preparations for an exam or calm the mind before giving an important business presentation. Some hope to become kinder and more considerate, to become the sort of person that has a consistently positive impact on others and their environment. Dr. Benson closes his book with the following lines, "You can choose any method of eliciting the (Relaxation) response which best fits your own inclinations: a secular, a religious, or an Eastern technique. We could all greatly benefit by the reincorporation of the Relaxation Response into our daily lives. At the present time, most of us are simply not making use of this remarkable, innate, neglected asset."

"The real meditation is how you live your life." - Jon Kabat-Zinn

Seeing is Believing

By Jim Freeman

"I used to be so delusional. I always imagined I could be more than I was, and eventually I grew and evolved into that person. I used to walk down the street like I was a ******* star...I want people to walk around delusional about how great they can be - and then fight so hard for it every day that the lie becomes the truth." - Lady Gaga

"Create a vision of who you want to be, and then live into that picture as if it were already true." - Arnold Schwarzenegger

"Even though you may not feel or look the part now, you must envision yourself in your ideal state, activating your personal power and living in alignment with your stand and purpose. I learned in the SEALs that there's no such thing as perfection, only perfect effort. Through practicing a 'perfect' version of ourselves mentally, we'll slowly become that person in real life." Mark Divine, The Way of the SEAL

"We have to visualize a successful victory before we even start a very difficult challenge. Stay hard!" - David Goggins

"I do not rush into actual work. When I get a new idea, I start at once building it up in my imagination, and make improvements and operate the device in my mind. When I have gone so far as to embody everything in my invention, every possible improvement I can think of, and when I see no fault anywhere, I put into concrete form the final product of my brain." - Nikola Tesla, My Inventions

"It sounds pretty funny, but over the years and definitely over the last four years, I've taken that visualization part to another level. I've basically visualized so many things on the field, making these big plays, scoring goals." - Carli Lloyd

"A lot of what we do is visualization. So to be able to go a year in advance, to the spot where we plan on winning a gold medal, and to take in the sight, the sounds, the stress, the excitement, that's going to serve us really well moving forward." - Kerry Walsh Jennings

"When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: The people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly." - Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Noted Scottish author, poet and theologian, George MacDonald said "Seeing is not believing. It is only seeing." Tom Hanks is quoted as saying "Believing is seeing and seeing is believing." For the purposes of titling this article we will stick to the well-worn phrase used above. Whenever I suggest using some kind of visualization to players that I coach I'm often met with a certain amount of skepticism. One way I combat that is by providing plenty of examples of well-known people talking about how much the tactic has helped them reach their goals and improve their performance. Hence the rash of quotes at the beginning of this article just in case some readers may be a bit skeptical as well. The quotes by highly successful people across a variety of disciplines at the top of this essay describe the regular use of different imagery motivations and techniques. Some use a form of visualization that centers around long-term goal-setting and some use mental imaging that is for a more specific activity or competition. 

Stoic philosophers like Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Epictetus promoted the notion of Negative Visualization ('premeditatio malorum' or premeditation of evils). The idea behind that approach is to encourage people to be prepared for struggles to come and plan ahead on how that adversity will be confronted (including some of the people you will deal with that day). David Goggins expounds on that sentiment in his book Can't Hurt Me, "But visualization isn't simply about daydreaming of some trophy ceremony - real or metaphorical. You must also visualize the challenges that are likely to arise and determine how you will attack those problems when they do. That way you can be as prepared as possible on the journey." Being as prepared as possible is the goal of any successful athlete, surgeon, soldier or performer. Visualization is an enormously important part of pre-event training regardless of the activity.

Commonly used mental imaging techniques center around career or health goals and more specific performance objectives. We will explore mental imaging by giving examples of specific performance ambitions in this essay but the strategies are equally applicable for career or health aims as well. During the 1976 Olympics, Soviet weightlifters performed so capably that the rest of the competing countries were quite eager for them to reveal the secret of such overwhelming success. That secret, they acknowledged, was visualization. Aristotle used the word 'phantasia' and Cicero coined the term 'mentis oculi' (mind's eye) to describe the idea of forming a mental picture of events real or imagined. That is exactly what the Soviets were referring to. They went to the event site in Montreal well before the contest was held. They visualized being at the Olympics in front of a live audience and hearing the crowd. They imagined approaching the bar loaded with a specific weight and they saw themselves chalking up, gripping the bar and lifting the weight. Every detail was visualized and the strategy helped produce seven gold medals and one silver in 9 weight classes.

Carli Lloyd has often discussed her use of meditation and visualization before each game in order to see herself in numerous situations that could occur in the match. After scoring three goals in the 2015 FIFA World Cup final she commented that she had visualized herself scoring four goals in that contest months prior, "...if your mental state isn't good enough, you can't bring yourself to bigger and better things...I've just constantly been visualizing, constantly growing confidence with each and every game and I was on a mission." Lloyd scored a hat trick in the first 30 minutes of play and was so in the zone that she felt as though she had "blacked out" during that period of time.

In his book, The Art of Learning, Josh Waitzkin recounts how he used imaging techniques to aid in overcoming a broken hand that occurred seven weeks before the 2001 Tai Chi Push Hands National Championships, "I had an idea that I might be able to keep my right side strong by intense visualization practice...I did a daily resistance workout routine on my left side, and after every set I visualized the workout passing to the muscles on the right. My arm was in a cast, so there was no movement possible - but I could feel the energy flowing into the unused muscles...My whole body felt strong, and when the doctor finally took off my cast he was stunned. Four days before the Nationals an X-ray showed that my bone was fully healed, and I had hardly atrophied at all. The doctor cleared me to compete." The will to recover or sustain physical capability in an area of the body that has been damaged or unable to train speaks to the potential of mental imaging and the discipline it takes to be successful on a large scale.

Dr. Larry Widman suffered damage to a facial nerve after contracting the shingles virus in 2014. He was forced to deal with facial paralysis, vertigo and tremendous pain. His doctors told him that he had about a 50 percent chance of regaining use of that nerve. In his book, Max Out Mindset he explains what he did to attack the situation, "I took my anatomy books out, visualized the regrowth of the facial nerve, and practiced five minutes every day." Dr. Widman combined visualization with goal-setting and meditation to successfully address his condition in a manner similar to what Mr. Waitzkin did with his broken hand. Aside from the imaging techniques that both men used, they each exhibited a mindset that was optimistic and relentless. Visualization apart from those two qualities will prove to be considerably less effective. 

In Steven Pressfield's book, The Lion's Gate: On the Front Lines of the Six Day War, an Israeli reconnaissance pilot describes his pre-flight activities during the 1967 conflict, "Preparing for these missions, I would hole myself up in the operations bunker and go over every detail of the coming flight. This is not like studying for exams. You are running the mission like a movie through your mind, anticipating every possible emergency, then planning and mentally rehearsing your response." Including this detailed and cinematic approach to pre-flight training allowed the pilots to successfully confront danger, emergencies and potentially lethal events that could typically be unforseen and possibly fatal.

A number of examples of mental imaging in an assortment of pursuits have been presented above. All involve "seeing", "hearing" and "feeling" the circumstances of the proceedings prior to actually performing in that event. Jack Nicklaus once said the he never took a swing of any kind without first seeing it in his mind. He would do so during every practice and every tournament. Pre-event visualization is best done in a state of relaxation. After meditating for 10-15 minutes, take another five minutes to practice some mental imaging. It can be done in the morning and again at night before bedtime. Begin by sitting comfortably in a chair or on the floor and closing your eyes. See yourself playing or practicing your activity as intensely and clearly as possible. Imagine being surrounded by your teammates and fans, even smelling the popcorn being sold at the concession stand. Repeatedly see yourself taking swings, passing the ball, or receiving serve. Image the score and the context. Feel the pressure of the contest and imagine yourself effectively managing it. See yourself bouncing back immediately from an error. Envision yourself making a variety of shots, scoring goals and sinking putts. This mental practice takes advantage of the brain's ability to create new neural pathways. We can literally rewire our brains to produce more productive and efficient neural patterns. Another method is to see all of the above through the eyes of the participant as opposed to those of an outside observer (looking at yourself). Becoming immersed as deeply as possible in the imagining of your future performance will inevitably yield greater results. Unfailingly, one will get distracted while visualizing. When that happens, calmly and non-judgmentally return to your mental practice session. Don't allow the mental imaging process to turn into a negative by castigating yourself for getting distracted.

If you struggle developing a mindset of optimism, aggression or relentlessness, you can use mental imagery to improve in those areas as well. Visualization isn't limited to physical acts. It can also be used to improve mental states. See yourself being aggressive and imposing your will on situations and circumstances using some of the methods explained above.

Dr. Jim Loehr states that the brain "is unable to differentiate between something vividly imagined from actual reality." (The New Toughness Training for Sports) In that book he also recommends the use of "mirrors, photographs and videos to strengthen and improve the accuracy of the mental pictures you have of yourself performing." Many years ago I used to show a video to my high school baseball team of Rod Carew hitting a baseball over and over. It was set to some soothing New Age music and showed the hall of fame hitter taking swing after swing at different kinds of pitches from each side of the plate. We would sit in the darkened library and watch...well, some watched and some fell asleep. The point was to implant the images of Mr. Carew's swing in the minds of our players right before we would go practice in order to slowly change their motor patterns and improve performance. 

All of this has some applications for coaching and instruction as well. Using visuals of any kind is generally considerably more effective than using verbal instruction when it comes to teaching players how to improve a physical skill. W. Timothy Gallwey explores this matter thoroughly in his excellect "Inner Game" books (Tennis, Golf, Skiing and Work). He advises the learner to visualize the task and observe skilled participants engaged in that same task instead of relying on a coach to provide verbal cues such as "lift your elbow" or "bend your knees". He gives the example of a child learning to walk. They do so naturally without their parents standing over them providing verbal instruction. Children learn naturally by observing other people walking and then they begin to do so themselves. The reliance on verbal instruction often gets in the way of the natural learning process and is sometimes accompanied by feelings of being judged by the coach or instructor. Removing judgement from the quality of the effort is one key to unblocking the learning process and allowing for  natural learning to take place. Players tend to pass judgement on themselves while practicing or playing and don't need further judgement added to the mix. Instead the athlete should view an error as a fact-finding mission, learn from it and move on to the next play or repetition. Coaches should see themselves as guides in the learning process rather than assuming a sort of dictatorial presence in the sporting lives of their players. I realize that many coaches like to comment and provide a significant amount of verbal feedback when working with their athletes. I would encourage those coaches to try to add some visual instruction to their toolbag.

Visualization is one of many devices that can be used to train the mind and improve performance and it only takes a few minutes a day to get results. It is a form of preparation routinely applied across a wide range of fields from surgery to public speaking to special operations to golf. A bit of patience and discipline is all that is required. Human performance expert, Dr. Frank Niles comments "it's massively effective, as long as you practice it."

Daily Affirmation

By Jim Freeman

A popular 1991 Saturday Night Live skit "Daily Affirmation with Stuart Smalley" featured comedian Al Franken as a sort of self-help guru and routinely showed his character talking to himself in the mirror and repeating the phrase "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and doggone it, people like me." However, the sketches would invariably find Stuart also saying to himself "I don't know what I'm doing. They're gonna cancel the show. I'm gonna die homeless and penniless and twenty pounds overweight and no one will ever love me." The sketches were so well-received that they resulted in a spin-off novel and a feature film. The episode featuring Michael Jordan (pictured above) was a particularly entertaining example and can be found on YouTube.

We all talk to ourselves. Some of us may also do it out loud at times but we all have a nearly constant conversation with ourselves taking place in our heads. We talk to ourselves even when we're having conversations with someone else. What sorts of things are we saying to ourselves? What effect are those conversations having on our performance whether it's in the classroom, the boardroom or on the field? Are those conversations positive, helpful, and optimistic? Or do they tend to lead us into more negative and less productive territory? In It Takes What It Takes, Trevor Moawad describes this phenomenon as an "Ad Campaign in Your Brain". In my experience as a coach I've found that a significant percentage of my players have an "ad campaign" runnning inside their heads that is less than positive or productive when it comes to their performance. Players commonly say very critical things to themselves...things they would never repeat to a teammate. Greg Dale (Director of Sports Psychology and Leadership Program at Duke University) writes in It's A Mental Thing!, "Many athletes are much harder on themselves than they are on others because they know they can get away with it and they think it will help push them to avoid making the same mistake again. The reality is this type of self-talk is ultimately detrimental to consistent high level performance because it is detrimental to confidence." Harvey Dorfman states in Coaching the Mental Game, "The athlete must start to listen to himself, understanding that as he expresses these negatives each day, he increases the chances of a negative outcome." Many players that I know have an extremely difficult time gaining any measure of control over their self-talk and remain in a near constant state of being their own worst enemy. What can be done to control or change these internal discussions? Or are they hard-wired with little hope for alteration?

A player's self-identity too often revolves around competence and production. When performance lags behind what the athlete expects or what she believes others may expect then her internal conversations can quickly take a negative turn. Carol Dweck discusses this at length in Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. She outlines two approaches to performance: a fixed mindset versus a growth mindset. A fixed mindset is reflective of a line of thinking that sees our talents and abilities as unchangeable or immutable. The growth mindset takes the exact opposite approach. She describes the fruits of a fixed mindset thusly, "I've seen so many people with this one consuming goal of proving themselves - in the classroom, in their careers, and in their relationships. Every situation calls for a confirmation of their intelligence, personality, or character. Every situation is evaluated: Will I succeed or fail? Will I look smart or dumb? Will I be accepted or rejected? Will I feel like a winner or a loser?" The growth mindset produces a different mentality and is centered around the notion that one's abilities can be developed and improved, that we're not just stuck struggling with the hand we are dealt. Dweck describes the thinking produced by a growth mindset, "...everyone can change and grow through application and experience...a person's true potential is unknown (and unknowable)...it's impossible to foresee what can be accomplished with years of passion, toil, and training." Ultimately an individual with a fixed mindset is left fighting for approval and acceptance while the person with a growth mindset is working to develop and improve. The growth mindset allows for hope, optimisim and belief in the value of learning and work. With this approach we have reason to view our self-talk as not pre-programmed and unchangeable but something that can be controlled and improved upon.

Angela Duckworth points out in her best-selling book Grit that "High-performers and low-performers both have a running internal dialogue - the difference is what they use it to say." In order to perform at a higher level that internal dialogue needs to be helpful instead of detrimental. One self-talk strategy involves replacing negative self-talk with more affirming statements. Mike Voight has authored a series of books on mental toughness and he advises athletes to identify their most common negative thoughts and self-talk statements that occur before and during contests. He then suggests athletes compile a list of those thoughts and statements followed by a list of positive thoughts and statements to replace the negative ones. The next step "entails believing in the productive statements and not the negative ones. Players do this by 'building a case' for why these productive thoughts and statements are true." (Mental Toughness Training for Volleyball) This involves making a list of reasons why the individual has cause to feel confident or optimistic such as "I earned a spot on this team and I deserve to be here." As the case is built for believing in the positive thoughts and statements written down earlier the ad campaign in the player's head shifts to a more helpful one. Voight stresses the need to continue to review and revise the new more positive ad campaign so this productive mindset is able to be sustained.

W. Timothy Gallwey has written several "Inner Game" books including titles covering tennis, golf and skiing. In all of them he advocates lessening the impact of the conscious (Self 1) by removing judgement from the activity and trusting in the subconscious (Self 2). This means we don't necessarily have to fill our heads with statements like "I'm the best!". Instead Gallwey posits a more functional and neutral strategy. He suggests repeating the phrase "Bounce-Hit" (when playing tennis). "Say the word 'bounce' out loud the instant you see the ball hit the court and the word 'hit' the instant the ball makes contact with the racket - either racket" (The Inner Game of Tennis).  Thus the notion of a good swing or a bad swing is taken away and the athlete is allowed to feel the movement with no judgement attached in a state of what Gallwey calls "relaxed concentration". As this occurs more frequently trust is established between Self 1 and Self 2 and "eventually the basic but elusive ingredient for all top performance emerges - self-confidence" (The Inner Game of Tennis). 

A similarly neutral and non-judgemental approach to self-talk is discussed in Moawad's book It Takes What It Takes, "No one will be able to influence me like I will be able to influence me. This is particularly true when the words come out of my mouth and start immediately connecting to behaviors. Words become self-fulfilling prophecies. So if I created an internal ad campaign that presents me as a loser no would want to listen to, I would act as if my talents didn't matter. I'd wonder why anyone would want to read this book. And that would make it very difficult to write this book. Instead, my internal ad campaign during this process is a series of neutral statements explaining why I'm writing this book..." A negative ad campaign can cripple performance to the point of obliteration. I have watched the level of play of countless players and teams spiral out of control because of this kind of negative and judgemental thinking. As a result, all the work on skill development and tactics in countless hours of practice is rendered useless. Instead it is possible for performers in all arenas to create a more constructive frame of mind that allows them to trust their training and freely execute in an unconscious, non-judgemental state.

I am often reminded of a particular volleyball player I coached many years ago who really struggled in her attempts to move past mistakes on the court. She was an excellent student and went through her school day routinely scoring very highly on her classroom assignments, quizzes and exams. She didn't get much practice in coping with failure in her academic life. However, a sporting environment is rife with opportunities to practice dealing with mistakes and failure. I am certain that she ascribed a moral judgement to her athletic struggles....it wasn't just a pass that was off the mark...it was a bad pass. In hindsight it is easy to see that her identity was dominated by a fixed mindset approach to her performance. She expected herself to be consistently competent and I'm sure she felt it was expected of her by others as well. At the time we talked about the dehumanizing and unreasonable nature of that kind of thinking. Once she shanked a pass in serve receive, the odds of her continuing to struggle were quite high. She saw herself as having failed and let down her teammates. Her body language was indicative of an internal dialogue that was filled with negativity. We discussed what was happening and settled on a strategy where I would repeat the neutral, non-judgemental phrase "bounce back" when she erred and her competitive spirit waned. After awhile I didn't have to say it anymore. She was saying it to herself. When she made a mistake she would look down and then immediately look up with a focused and determined look in her eyes. She was controlling her self-talk and using it to produce a more consistently productive level of performance. I had much to learn regarding these matters (and many more) but it's one of my earliest memories as a coach concerning the impact of mindset on performance.

Marcus Aurelius (Roman emperor and author of Meditations) once wrote "I can control my thoughts as necessary; then how can I be troubled? What is outside my mind means nothing to it. Absorb that lesson and your feet stand firm." As discussed in prior essays, humans have been wrestling with these issues for thousands of years. Such struggles are not new to us. The human condition has remained constant in such matters and will continue to do so. The good news is that solutions to these problems are readily available and when applied on a consistent basis will yield desirable results. "The point is that you can, in fact, modify your self-talk, and you can learn to not let it interfere with you moving toward your goals. With practice and patience, you can change the way you think, feel, and, most important, act when the going gets rough." (Angela Duckworth, Grit)

How to Thrive When Everything Feels Terrible

By Christine Porath and Mike Porath

Harvard Business Review

How to Thrive When Everything Feels Terrible (hbr.org)

October 30, 2020

Summary.   

It can feel impossible to escape from negativity right now. Fortunately, research shows that we can protect ourselves from the damaging effects of toxicity by taking steps to ensure we are “thriving” — a psychological term to describe the state in which people experience a sense of both vitality and learning. Simple choices can encourage thriving. The authors provide several tactics, based on research, for choosing positivity, including being careful about the news and social media you consume, watching which negative thoughts you vocalize out loud, and adopting a neutral mindset when faced with challenges.

We’re surrounded by negativity everywhere we turn. The news we read, social media we peruse, and conversations we have and overhear. We absorb stress from our family, friends, and coworkers. And, it’s taking a toll.

The Mighty, a community platform (founded by Mike) that provides health information and brings people together around specific health issues, has surveyed more than 70,000 readers and community members since March around their awareness, perceptions, and experience with the coronavirus crisis. In September, respondents reported their top three emotions were frustration, worry, and anger. The number of respondents choosing anger as one of their top emotions has more than doubled since March — rising from 20% then to 45% in September.

Negativity can have toxic effects. In fact, Christine’s research has shown over and over that we falter when exposed to negativity or rudeness. Witnessing rudeness interferes with our working memory and decreases our performance. Mere exposure to rude words reduces our ability to process and recall information. We tend to shut down, stop communicating, and cease being helpful to others. Dysfunctional and aggressive thoughts (and sometimes actions) skyrocket.

Fortunately, Christine’s research also shows that there is a productive way to counter those effects. It’s called thriving — the psychological state in which people experience a sense of both vitality and learning. Thriving individuals are growing, developing, and energized rather than feeling stagnated or depleted.

In studies conducted across a range of industries, Christine has found that people who experience a state of thriving are healthier, more resilient, and more able to focus on their work. When people feel even an inkling of thriving, it tends to buffer them from distractions, stress, and negativity. In a study of six organizations across six different industries, employees characterized as highly thriving demonstrated 1.2 times less burnout compared with their peers. They were also 52% more confident in themselves and their ability to take control of a situation. They were far less likely to have negativity drag them into distraction or self-doubt.

So how do you increase your thriving especially when it feels like you’re drowning in negativity? Our research points to some tactics.

Avoid negativity. Pay attention to what you’re ingesting: what information you chose to read, the media you consume, the music you listen to, the people you choose to spend time with, and the people you look up to. Negativity seeps into our pores through these sources. So make simple choices away from negativity and toward positivity.

Click on the link below to read the rest of the article:

How to Thrive When Everything Feels Terrible (hbr.org)

Coaching with grace: Geoff Carlston offers thoughts about the importance of the profession

By Volleyball Magazine Staff

https://volleyballmag.com/geoff-carlston-coaching-112620/

November 26, 2020

Geoff Carlston, who grew up in Minnesota, has coached on the college level for 20 years. He has been the head coach at Concordia University-St. Paul, Ohio University, and, from 2008-19, The Ohio State University.
He and his wife, Sara, now live with their three youngs boys in Colorado, where Geoff is coaching beach volleyball players of all ages, including a rising AVP men’s team.
This article grew through his AVCA presentations on storytelling, conversations with coaches, and his own experiences:  

 

By Geoff Carlston for VolleyballMag.com

There is no other vocation quite like coaching.

We give of ourselves, heart and spirit, because we genuinely want to make a difference. Coaches epitomize what cultivates meaning in this crazy world we walk in. We trust, we aspire, we inspire, we teach, we love.

The coach’s path is not for everyone. The road is filled with moments that can relentlessly drop us to our knees.

We lose on the court, exposed in front of multitudes of all-knowing fans in the bleachers and screens. They will never understand a coach’s drive home, ruminating at each stoplight about a game-altering play we wish we could have back. We shepherd the dreams of our players and staff, taking on their pain, stories, injuries and doubts. A coach is wired for strong shoulders.

On the other side of the adventure, this journey affords us joys most could not even imagine experiencing in their work. A coach understands that you cannot have one without the other. They are intertwined and symbiotic.

Yet as competitive as every coach I know is, they are in the arena because they believe, to their core, in the magic of teachable moments. These slices of time are too often missed, lost in the fog of the day’s chatter and noise. Great coaches capture and breathe life into them. They build the stage for stories to be written and understand that the best verses are born from these moments. So we are there when our players feel joy, when they are in a lonely hospital bed, when their spirit is broken and when they fly.

We are there to grieve when a parent dies. We are there to listen when they are at their weakest, and we are there to let go when they begin to realize the strength of personal courage. We are there. An impactful coach shows up, stays in the muck with them every single day.

Click on the link below to read the rest of the article:

https://volleyballmag.com/geoff-carlston-coaching-112620/

Photo Credit: Shelby Lum/The Lantern

Be Water, My Friend

 By Jim Freeman

"Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend." - Bruce Lee

Bruce Lee remains one of the most influential martial artists of all time and his iconic "Be Water" quote is drawn from centuries of Eastern philosophy and wisdom. Mr. Lee's daughter Shannon has a new book out on the teachings of her late father titled Be Water, My Friend. Ms. Lee expounds on her father's thoughts and how they can be used to aid personal growth on a daily basis. It is enthusiastically recommended. Confucius, the great Chinese philosopher who lived hundreds of years before Christ and thousands of years before Mr. Lee, stated "As the water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it, so a wise man adapts himself to circumstances." Marcus Aurelius, stoic Roman emperor and philosopher, wrote "We have the power to hold no opinion about a thing and not to let it upset our state of mind, for things have no natural power to shape our judgements." Ideas and teachings concerning balance and controlling one's mind in order to be more productive and increase one's quality of life have been in place for thousands of years. Finding a sort of mental neutral gear that allows us to better adapt and control our thoughts and emotions in order to improve performance and maximize our potential is what Mr. Lee was stressing when he advised the listener to be like water.

We discussed judgmental thinking and its negative impact on performance in the last article. Applying any sort of judgement to a performance makes things more complicated and more difficult. It distracts us and heightens anxiety. Most people don't need convincing when it comes to the harmful impact that negative thinking brings to performance. Judging athletic endeavors as though we're putting ourselves on trial for some crime will cripple performance every single time. It's easy to persuade athletes and coaches to limit the negative...the benefit is obvious. What about removing that judgement from our sporting life altogether...including some positive thinking and commentary?

We touched on the notions of a judging and commanding Self 1 and the doing, natural learning Self 2 as discussed in W. Timothy Gallwey's The Inner Game of Tennis in our previous essay. Self 1 is the critical and interfering judge reminding the athlete of every "bad" swing...every "dumb" mistake. Self 2 is the performer in a natural state of non-judgmental playing and learning. Helping the athlete learn how to limit the negative critiquing of Self 1 so Self 2 can be "in the zone" or play in an unconscious state more often is the goal. But what about positive thinking? That's got to be good right? There are probably as many books and magazine articles on the power of positive thinking as there are on the harmful effects of negative thinking... maybe more. I have no issues with a "Positive Thinking" approach except that it leaves open the possibility of falling prey to a judging mindset that feeds that Self 1 persona. Sometimes trying to think positive is one more thing to be anxious about, one more thing to beat ourselves up about when we fail to do it. I believe this is especially true when we're trying to get a handle on the self-critiquing Self 1 in the early stages of this process.

When I was an assistant high school girls basketball coach many years ago we had a player on our team who was athletic, talented and worked very hard. She was also very tough on herself mentally and I routinely suggested that she try to think positively...to be more positive in general. At one point in a practice I again reminded her of that and she whirled towards me in a state of near panic and yelled "I've tried that! It doesn't work!" I will never forget the look of frustration and desperation in her eyes. I can still see it all these years later. At the time I didn't really understand how my advice to think positive was just one more thing for her to stress about, one more thing to struggle with. I thought I was helping...looking back I'm sure that I was not.

Trevor Moawad, author of It Takes What It Takes, opined in an interview I saw him give with Michael Johnson (Olympic and World Champion sprinter) that "positive thinking creates another layer of pressure on people...it creates more anxiety than the upside value of it." As a coach I have tried to be much more positive than negative when giving feedback. However, we see how easy it can be for Self 1 to start chasing positive feedback like "nice swing" or "good pass"...and just that quickly we're back in the judgment zone again. The ego of Self 1 can turn any compliment into a morality play...if this swing is "good" then the swing that fails to elicit praise is "bad". The end result of this is a distracted athlete who is once again rating the goodness of their efforts. Moawad preaches the benefits of a neutral-thinking approach to performance...an approach that is neither negative or positive. He writes, "The actual truth is not negative or positive when you remove judgement from it. Neutral is the harmony between two extremes, negative and positive." The concept of neutral thinking is not a new one...in fact, Moawad sounds positively Zen in his approach.

The legendary sixteenth-century Japanese "sword saint", Miyamoto Musashi and his work The Five Rings (or Writings on the Five Spheres) were mentioned in the previous essay. His writings are divided into five sections or scrolls (relating to the five spheres in the title). In the section called "Water" he discusses his style of swordsmanship and its broader applications.  The following quotes in this scroll can be seen to espouse a neutral approach to the samurai's sword discipline as well as his daily life. 

"In the Way of Strategy, your mindset should not differ from your everyday mind. In daily life or in strategic moments, without changing it even the slightest bit, make your mind broad and straight. Without trying to rein it in tightly, or letting it go slack at all, and in such a way that it does not lean in any particular direction, center your mind exactly, and set it quietly vibrating. You should investigate exhaustively..." I remain ignorant as to the specifics of the vibrating mind concept but I had to include it...clearly I need to investigate this more thoroughly. 

"In this Way (of Strategy), it is especially important for you to understand that the middle is the ultimate position. The middle is the original meaning of "position". Look at the large-scale strategy: the middle position is the general's seat. The other four positions follow the general's orders. Investigate this diligently."

Musashi was a lifelong student of Buddhism and such concepts as emptiness, mindfulness and formlessness appear throughout his teachings. Buddhism originated in India between the 5th and 4th centuries BC and spread to China before being brought to Japan. Japanese Zen emerged as a separate school in the 12th century. Musashi's idea of a "no form, no thought" strike springs from those philosophies and traditions. "When your adversary is about to strike, and you also want to strike, with your body becoming the body of the strike and your spirit becoming the spirit of striking, your hand spontaneously strikes out of nowhere, quickly and powerfully. This - called "no thought, no form" - is a strike of paramount importance. This strike is a frequently used one; learn it well, and train it diligently." 

Phrases like "investigate this exhaustively" and "train this diligently" are sprinkled throughout The Five Rings. "Forge yourself with a thousand days of training, and polish yourself with ten thousand days of practice. This is something you need to investigate thoroughly." These phrasings are some of my favorites in the book, whether referring to physical training or mental/spiritual training, diligence is constantly stressed. Finding that neutral state and maintaining it requires constant practice and discipline. 

A foundational aspect of staying neutral is to be in the moment and not let what has already happened or what may yet happen affect what is happening right now. A quote from Nick Saban hammers home this point, "What happened yesterday is history. What happens tomorrow is a mystery. What we do today makes a difference - the precious present moment." If we are concerned with previous failures or previous successes we will be distracted from maximizing performance in the here and now. Saban emphasizes concentrating on the process...doing one's best on this practice rep or this play and then moving on to the next repetition or play. The ability to remain focused on what's happening right now allows the player to stack maximized repetitions until at the end of that practice or game the individual has produced a series of excellent performances.

We can only think about one thing at a time. If we are thinking about relevant cues regarding the job at hand then we won't have room for the negative thoughts that hinder performance. Moawad discusses this "law of substitution" in his book, "...we function best when we're broadcasting a series of strong, neutral statements to ourselves and don't let outside noise or our own internal chatter derail those thoughts." Staying locked in on what is happening at the moment and using neutral task-based statements is the template for neutral thinking. Gallwey developed the "Bounce-Hit" tactic for tennis...he has his students say those words as they concentrate on seeing the ball bounce on their side of the net and when it contacts their racket. He found that his students performed more effortlessly and more effectively as they adopted that technique. They weren't distracted by judgmental thinking because they had something else to think about that didn't cause them to freeze up.

There is also plenty of time to go negative between plays, strokes or quarters. Staying in a neutral and productive state of mind during periods of inactivity is an important aspect of performing consistently at our best for longer stretches. Russell Wilson uses the statements "great fundamentals, great balance, be engaged" during games in his role as quarterback of the Seattle Seahawks. He happens to be a client of Mr. Moawad and wrote the foreword to his book. Occupying the mind with things that concern the current play or upcoming play such as "what defense are they in?" or "see the ball hit the bat" is a way to avoid being distracted by the surrounding environment or circumstances of the event. Golf is a sport with a tremendous amount of "down time" during play and as such there is plenty of opportunity for Self 1 to take over and wreck the process of staying in a neutral, non-judgmental zone. Gallwey states in golf "It is most often in the interval between shots that both the inner and the outer game are won or lost." Keeping the mind busy with relevant task-oriented thinking is the way to stay out of that particular hazard (pun intended).

Limiting judgmental thinking and commentary that results in increased tension and anxiety during any event whether it is a business presentation, a piano recital or a golf game is a key component of producing maximal performances. The neutral, non-judgmental state produces a calm mind that is free to focus on what truly matters at that moment. This allows the body to act in a fluid and natural manner. Bruce Lee comments that "pliability is life, rigidity is death....the less tension and effort, the faster and more powerful you will be." Water can be placid like a mountain lake, trickle like a forest stream or pound like a tropical storm. Be water, my friend.

The Negativity Effect

By Jim Freeman

"I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful..." - Bob Wiley, What About Bob?

In the film referred to in the above quote Mr. Wiley is using a form of affirmative self-talk to create a more positive mindset. There is a scene early in the movie that shows Bob walking down the sidewalk of a busy city repeating this mantra while another gentleman bulls past him repeating a profanity-laced mantra of a different sort. Self-Talk is one of the most commonly prescribed tools in the field of sport psychology. However I've found that reactionary and unstructured conversations with ourselves can find us saying the worst things imaginable and believing them. We routinely say things to ourselves that we would never say to anyone else and we will be quick to believe those negative statements. The Negativity Effect or Negativity Bias involves the typical human response of lending more weight to negative experiences, comments or images than to positive or neutral ones. We will be impacted more by a negative comment or assessment than a positive one. This Negativity Effect looks to be hardwired into the human brain and realizing that is the first step toward gaining a measure of control over it. Christine Porath, a professor at Georgetown has found that one toxic connection in the workplace is four to seven times more impactful than a positive one. Dr. Mike Bechtle notes that it takes three to four seconds for bad news to enter our long-term memory and 12 seconds for good news. If we are distracted during those 12 seconds the good news will never even make it into our long term memory. Dr. Barbara Frederickson, author of the book Positivity has written extensively on the serious damage that negative attitudes can have on our physical health while also documenting how overcoming the negativity bias is beneficial to health. Limiting  negativity and eventually flipping it to create positive imaging and self-talk is the generally accepted formula for progress in a wide variety of areas. Because the impact of the negative is so powerful we will first focus on limiting the negative...we'll get around to the positive down the road.

In their comprehensive book The Power of Bad John Tierney and Roy F. Baumeister posit their "Rule of Four": It takes four good things to overcome one bad thing. Baumeister co-authored a journal article in 2001 titled "Bad is Stronger Than Good" which eventually led to the publication of the book he co-wrote with Tierney. Tierney and Baumeister write that "avoiding bad is far more important than doing good when you're dealing with lovers, children, friends, colleagues or anyone else. It's not what you do unto others. It's what you don't do." I'll be so bold as to suggest that list of people can include ourselves as well.

Going negative is something I've experienced myself as an athlete and a coach and observed in every single team I've ever worked with. No individual and no team is able to "stay positive" all the time. We've all seen teams fall prey to this kind of destructive thinking. The trick is to limit how long we stay in that negative zone. Scott Adams writes in his book Loserthink "The thoughts you allow into your head are the code that programs your mind and body." Avoiding spending a significant amount of time dwelling on negative thoughts gives us a chance to code programs that will be beneficial to performance instead of hindering it. 

One of my pet peeves (besides the term "pet peeve") as a coach is the athlete who taps their chest and says "My B" or "My bad" after making a mistake. I coached a volleyball player years ago who routinely did it after serving into the net or forgetting to go to the correct place on defense. I was usually tempted to yell "No bleeping $%#@ it's your B!" Fortunately I was able to refrain from succumbing to that form of temptation every time it happened. The "my B" thing is commonly done after a mistake that is obvious to all as to who is at fault. That obviousness is one aspect of the act that irritates me, another is that it's sometimes used as a casual apology of sorts. The most problematic part of it is that it doesn't really allow the athlete or the rest of the team to move forward from the error with confidence and belief. I've seen many players say it and carry that sense of failure into the next play and their teammates are affected by it. Athletes, coaches and teams don't need any help dwelling on mistakes. The real trick is to put that mistake behind us immediately and prepare for the next play. Allowing one error to turn into three or four more is how losing is done.

W. Timothy Gallwey in his enormously influential book The Inner Game of Tennis discusses the notion that each of us has two selves: Self 1 is the conscious mind, the thinker, the boss and Self 2 is the subconscious mind, the executer, the performer. Self 1 is the part of ourselves that usually needs to be brought to heel. That's the part that wants to immediately assign some kind of judgement to our actions. If a golfer hooks a drive into the woods, Self 1 will be inclined to say something along the lines of "that was an idiotic swing, get your $%&# together!" Chances are such judgements won't facilitate an improvement in performance off the next tee. In fact, it's entirely possible that the next swing out of the woods will produce another less than desirable result. Such judgmental commentary will continue to cause the golfer to tighten up even more and result in continued struggle possibly culminating in my personal go-to response of shouting obscenities and throwing clubs. Gallwey writes "....the player's muscles tighten when they need to be loose, strokes become awkward and less fluid, and negative evaluations are likely to continue with growing intensity." Stacking errors because Self 1 has turned Self 2 into its personal scapegoat can be avoided if judgment is removed from the process. Athletic movements are not moral acts...there is no "wrong" swing. There are swings that don't produce the desired result. There is a difference. 

In The Book of Five Rings the legendary sixteenth century samurai Miyamoto Musashi compares the observing eye and the perceiving eye, "Observation and perception are two separate things; the observing eye is stronger' and the perceiving eye is weaker." The observing eye is strictly concerned with reality: what is there, what we see, what is actually happening, nothing more. The perceiving eye distracts us by seeing more than what is there: fear and doubt, misperceptions, value judgements, questions of why. The observing eye focuses on what we can control, the perceiving eye gets bogged down by issues and speculations that are beyond our control. The perceiving eye presents information that we don't need and it often gives that information at a time that is less than ideal. Thinking about how many putts we missed on the last green as we begin our backswing driving off the next tee is not a winning strategy. Calming our emotions and seeing things as they really are will allow us to remove distractions and judgments from the process and give us the opportunity to succeed. Musashi is heralded for his innovative swordsmanship and an  undefeated record in 61 contests including victories in duels where he lost his sword. It seems that relying on the observing eye in a duel where one's sword has been lost would be crucial if one hoped to survive such a battle.

Trevor Moawad in his excellent book It Takes What It Takes  discusses the power of speaking negatively, "Thinking about my struggles is nowhere near as powerful as verbalizing them. When it comes out of my mouth it affects me tenfold...The choice to verbalize our negativity is a death sentence." I see athletes dealing with this kind of negativity and doubt on a regular basis. Anything I say or do as a coach is not going to be nearly as impactful as what that athlete thinks or says to herself. "My bad" is one example of this but I routinely hear gloomy commentary regarding performance and I have become quick to say that it's one thing to think it but it's an entirely different thing to say it. Statements like "I just can't pass today" or "#@$& I suck today!" are so crippling that they just cannot be said. Thus, our first goal as performers of any kind is in the words of Moawad to "stop saying stupid $%#@"...in other words stop saying anything negative out loud. Reducing the negative effect of vocalizing our judgmental thoughts will have a significant impact on our own performance and the performance of those around us. 

As an aside, the fact that what a player says to herself is much more impactful than any critique I might give as a coach doesn't mean that I can take a casual approach to what I say. I've become more and more cognizant of the massive influence my negative comments can have on a player and I'm very careful about how and when I make them. Tierney and Baumeister talk about this at length in their chapter on how to deliver bad news. People's memories kick into high gear when seeing or hearing something negative and as a result that bad news will override or wipe out any good news delivered beforehand. I try to get the bad news out of the way first and then smother it with a lot of positive commentary so the player can move forward feeling better about things.

The first step for an athlete in limiting the negative is to remove judgement and self-condemnation from the equation. Gallwey states "There is a more natural process of learning and performing waiting to be discovered. It is waiting to show what it can do when allowed to operate without interference from the conscious strivings of the judgmental self."